Break Up With Food.

All creatures on earth, whether human or animals, need food to live. But only humans have taken that need and turned it into an obsession. Of all the idiosyncrasies of food addictions, the one I find the most detrimental is that of “comfort food.” The idea that food is anything other than nourishment is again, exclusive only to humans.


The joy that some of us feel from food preparation and savoring of flavors (the artistic side of cuisine) is undeniably one of the most wonderful uses of some of our five senses (taste, smell and even vision). The flip side of this is that somehow society at large (pun intended) has equated certain foods to that of providing comfort.


There’s no question that all of us have childhood memories (and other situational sense memories) that are directly tied to food. A special recipe your mother created when you were sick, or on birthdays, as well as dishes we ate when we were “happy” or “in love” become go to foods when, as adults, life is not where we want it to be. While it’s true that certain foods create a chemical reaction that can elevate moods, the idea that food can fill up a painful hole within our hearts is a slippery slope. What makes this worse is that traditionally most “comfort foods” are high in fat, salt, and/or sugar.


I have many a client and friend that spends days or months being diligent about their nutritional intake, only to blow it all away because they had an emotional disturbance that they responded to by eating “comfort foods.” How many movies have shown women sitting in front of the TV crying while shoveling in an entire pint of Ben & Jerry’s? Or how many nights are lonely bachelors depicted scarfing down fast food take out after a night of drinking? These movies reflect real life – raise your hand if you’ve ever done this.


As I always say, everything’s okay in moderation – including pints of ice cream and multiple Taco Bell indiscernible meat tacos, but the problem here is that a lot of people have a regular routine of eating these “bad for your body” foods every single time they’re upset, frustrated or sad.


If this behavior resonates with you, then I offer this advice: break up with food! Stop “dating” food to make you feel better, especially when in reality, it does just the opposite. Repeated indulgences in comfort food is no better for you than that guy or girl who belittles your self-esteem.

See nutrition as a tool that allows your body and brain to function and deal with life. I use the Car analogy – most people put medium to high-grade gasoline in their car, see to regular oil changes, and keep all fluids and tire pressure to their peak levels. If you do not, your car will not drive well, handle huge hills, stay safe on wet roads, and eventually stop running completely. Well guess what, your body is the same.


If you find it difficult to walk away from food when you’re emotionally upset, then at least make better choices – find a healthier “comfort” – or keep the quantities of the unhealthy choices to a much smaller amount. Better still, deal with the feelings that you’re hiding from, and once they’re faced, you’ll undoubtedly not even need the food for comfort. One last choice to consider is exercise. I’ve had some of the best cardio sessions when I’ve been angry. When the day before I was bored and tired after 10 minutes on the treadmill, suddenly when fueled by a situation / conversation that left me hot-headed, I ran for 30 minutes straight!


Whether your goal is fat loss or just improved health and fitness, breaking up with comfort foods is an essential step to reaching your goal and staying there.

Neutral Perspective

As a life coach I find that my most used strategy in helping a client create a better and happier situation for themselves (whether relationships, career, or their emotional health) is to guide them to see a problem from a different perspective. We tend to approach all problems from the same angle with the same emotional perspective that is our “go to view” based upon our baggage and inherent personality traits. Quite often, that approach results in a failure to change the situation for the better.


Although it’s difficult to see a situation through foreign eyes, it is essential to breaking patterns that are detrimental to your life. I call the strategy “neutral perspective.” In a sense it’s about seeing the FACTS (factual evidence is generally indisputable) from an unemotional viewpoint. Once you look at the issues that are tangible and real and remove your own issues from the equation, a clear solution always presents itself.


A long time ago I heard a psychologist on the radio share a wonderful modern-day fable that perfectly demonstrates neutral perspective. It is the story of Three Men and a Naked Lady (bet you didn’t see that coming)! It goes like this:

Three men are sitting in a car at a stop light. Suddenly a completely naked woman walks in front of their car through the cross walk.

The driver views her with contempt for so brazenly taunting him and deems her a sinner and whore.

The front passenger views her with lust and admiration, knowing with certainty that she would welcome his advances and that perhaps he should follow her.

The back passenger though at first quite shocked, realizes that something is amiss and this poor woman needs help. He jumps out of the car, drapes his coat around her, and offers her a ride. She is beyond grateful. Turns out she was a kind and very wealthy woman who after being kidnaped and robbed, managed a daring escape albeit without her clothes. After accompanying her to the police and seeing to her safe return home, a week later the woman repays the man’s kindness with a lovely dinner and within a year they are married and live happily ever after.


This is a perfect example of emotional vs. neutral perspective. The first man felt inadequate in his relationships and had a negative view on women in general. The second man had learned to cover up his insecurities with arrogance and false bravado. The last man was emotionally balanced enough to look at the tangible facts in a situation and act accordingly. He saw a naked woman with bruises on her arms, crying and looking quite scared. He knew this had nothing to do with him.

So whatever it is in your life that is bringing you strife, stress, and/or heartache, perhaps it’s time you viewed the situation with neutral perspective. Once you can see clearly what the problem truly is (through factual evidence), a solution will clearly present itself. Then you just have to face implementing that solution – which is very often not easy but if the stakes are high enough to you, anything can be made better!


If you are interested in some life coaching help,

The Fountain Of Youth Myth

For centuries people have perpetuated the ancient lore that a fountain of youth existed. A magical pool of water (or some other substance) that could keep or transform youth and long life. Well if you didn’t already know this, it doesn’t exist!


I bring this up because of the current escalation in people using (or rather misusing) the latest fountain-of-youth-fad Human Growth Hormone (commonly referred to as “HGH”). HGH is produced by the pituitary gland, and helps to regulate several body issues such as metabolism, muscle and bone growth (more muscle, less fat), skin and hair quality, and your body’s assumption of sugars and fats. Traditionally it has been prescribed to help skeletally and muscularly underdeveloped children and adolescents grow taller or heavier.  But since the body’s HGH levels naturally decrease with age, people have now turned to HGH products with the misplaced idea that it can rev help them lose weight and more ridiculously reverse aging.


Thus, the market was flooded with injectable HGH via Internet pharmacies, anti-aging clinics, weight loss scam web sites, and worst of all, hack doctors (you must have a prescription for these injections). But now, with people always wanting an easier option, suddenly HGH in pill form is being peddled on infomercials or online ads that claim they will turn back your biological clock, reduce fat, build muscle, strengthen your immune system, level your blood sugars (appealing to diabetics) restore hair growth, and even improve your sex drive. However, the FTC (Federal Trade Commission) has found no proof or reliable evidence to support any of these claims especially in light of the fact that when taken orally (pill form) HGH is digested by the stomach long before your body can absorb it. So in case you missed it, swallowing an HGH pill, whether herbal or not (or using an spray), will NOT alter your body in any significant way.


The truth about HGH whether injected or in pill form is that it is NOT a fix for aging or fat loss, and there are dangers to its use as well. While HGH injections have been useful in the treatment of children and adults who have significant growth hormone deficiencies, for the rest of the population there is the potential for a myriad of serious side effects, including:

  • Swelling in the arms and legs
  • Carpal tunnel and arthritis like symptoms
  • Increase in headaches and muscle pain
  • On-set Diabetes
  • Abnormal growth of bones and organs
  • High blood pressure
  • hardening of arteries


So once again I find myself standing on my soapbox pleading with the masses to not look for shortcuts when it comes to improving their health. If you’ve been following my blog for any period now, you know that I’m a proponent of making the change to a healthier lifestyle quick, easy, and moderate (no extreme diets or two hour workouts). There are no shortcuts, but honestly, It’s not as hard as you think once you embrace these simple ideals:

  1. You must eat small healthy quantities 5-6 times a day while still allowing yourself small indulgences along the way;
  2. You must drink lots of water;
  3. You must exercise a minimum of 20 minutes, 3 times a week in a manner that elevates your heart rate and challenges your muscles; and
  4. You must stretch and seek improved or sustained muscle flexibility and balance, while also allowing for enough sleep/rest.


These four simple “musts” can become second nature if you are motivated enough and prioritize them into your life. They are far less expensive than pills or fad equipment or DVDs, and ultimately they will get you to your goal and keep you there. Endorphins help reduce inflammations (like arthritis), improved circulation will result in healthier hair, nails, and skin, and regular exercise elevates your energy all day (which can also directly translate into your sex drive if that’s one of your issues. Who needs HGH now?

Please stop looking for the fountain of youth – for in truth it only exists within your own commitment to stay healthy and active for as long as you’re destined to live.

Are You Sure It’s Healthy?

For years Americans have turned to salads as a safe, low-calorie meal they can freely consume when trying to “lose weight” (which as you know I appropriately renamed “lose fat”). Many an office worker suffers through weeks of homemade salads or restaurant salad bars just to they can feel like they’re eating healthier and, more importantly, leaner.


Well the truth has been out for some time that depending upon what’s on or in your salad, as well as the dressing type and quantity, salads aren’t necessarily better for you than a lean hamburger and a few fries or even a glass of diet soda.

Currently, the hottest weight-loss food trend is Juices and Smoothies. Tumblr and Pinterest are weighed-down (pun intended) with hundreds of breakfast juice recipes. Sorry to burst another bubble, but ingesting a large quantity of fruit sugars, even if they are balanced out with chia seeds and spinach, can still pack on “sugar” calories that can turn into fat.


The point is that you really have to consider all aspects of your nutrition to know if something is healthy for you. Take the afore-mentioned morning smoothie. An average recipe might include an apple, banana, carrot, spinach, blueberries and chia seeds, and maybe even a dash of yogurt. Depending upon the size and quantity of items, there can be anywhere from 45-60 grams of sugar. The recommended daily amount of sugar an average adult should consume is about 25 grams (6 teaspoons). One smoothie and you’re double and that’s just breakfast!


Back to the salads, here’s some perspective for you: McDonald’s Chicken Caesar Salad is your pretty run of the mill Caesar (including croutons and creamy dressing) and comes in at 425 calories and 21.4 grams of fat. Their regular burger is only 253 calories and 7.7 grams of fat. Even if you added a small fries, while your calories would be a touch higher (459), your fat grams would only be 16.7.

Perhaps you already know that Chinese Chicken and Caesar Salads are the worst salads you can eat when it comes to lean and healthy nutrition. But did you know that even without croutons or wantons and ditching cream based dressings, if you load up a salad with nuts, olives, sun-dried tomatoes, avocado, egg, quinoa, feta cheese, etc., you’re still consuming a lot of calories, sugars, and fat grams. Undoubtedly better for your insides than a Big Mac or anything from Taco Bell, but don’t be surprised if your fat loss slows down depending upon your habits and metabolism.


So next time you decide to clean up your nutrition, read labels and crunch numbers before you assume that juices and salads will get you to your goal. Ultimately, you’re always better off to eat moderate amounts of healthy foods, and exercise more rather than deny yourself something or over-consume something in it’s stead.


There’s a great article in the New Yorker about the detrimental effects of too much sugar.  Click on the photo below to read it.


Truth Is Hard

Almost everyone I talk to in my capacity as a life coach and friend has said to me at some point “I just don’t like confrontation.” If you read my March 2013 article Confrontation or Communication (and if you haven’t you might want to) then you know that the word confrontation has a bad rap. More to the point, 90% of the time when you think something is, or will be, confrontational, what’s really at stake is that you need to tell someone something you know they don’t want to hear and therefore assume they will become defensive, which makes you offensive – or the bad guy.


But I’m here to tell you that while truth is hard, truth is always better and more beneficial than passive aggressive attempts to soften a blow, or worse yet, sheer avoidance.  So take stock of your life and relationships, and see if there’s something you need to say to someone that you’re just not saying.

Are you afraid you’ll feel guilty – that’s usually what holds people back from sharing a important truth? Let me remind you that guilt is an emotional trigger designed to let your heart know when you’ve been ethically or morally wrong to another (or yourself). Telling the truth about your feelings, especially if done with tact and respect is never ethically or morally wrong.  As for tact and respect, that does not mean candy-coating or making the ‘lead’ be so buried under tangential fluff that the recipient never really understands your feelings. How you keep tactful and respectful is by staying succinct, on point, and keeping it about facts and YOUR feelings.


Say for example your friends or family want to come visit for a week-long vacation. You haven’t enough room to house them all comfortably, and you have too much on your plate with work, kids, after-school activities, budgetary concerns, etc., so it would be highly inconvenient for them to stay in your home for an entire week, especially when you are not on vacation too.

You’re reluctant to tell them the truth and hurt their feelings, disappoint them, or screw up their plans, especially since it would feel like the dreaded “confrontation” because they’ve made it clear that this is happening regardless of your feelings.  That is of course, because you haven’t been upfront with your feelings!


So you say something like:  of course you’re welcome, but I can’t take any time off to be with you and we don’t really have enough beds for all of you. They say not to worry, they don’t mind sleeping on the sofa or floor and will be gone most of each day sightseeing . But you know that you’ll feel the stress of wanting to keep your house clean, keep your kids on their routines and schedules, and just have your own space after a long day of work.

Then you try the more direct approach, though still veiled: any chance you can schedule this for the week of [blank] because they kids have no school then and I can take some vacation days or even join you at a hotel and have a staycation? Once again, they appreciate your idea or concern, but assure you that this is the best for them and they’re okay with you not being available.

Honesty-2Either way you been passively vague about how their visit would affect you, and neither approach took care of your needs. Now my response from the start would be I would love to see you but I have to be honest the weekdays are just not good for us to have guests. I hope that doesn’t mess up your plans, and if you need any help finding affordable hotels in the area I’d be happy to get you some recommendations.

Most people will appreciate that you didn’t martyr yourself and in many cases they would feel the same way about a disruption to their work/school week. Others may not, but again I remind you that you have not been wrong to them, you’ve been honest and right for yourself and your family. If they are disgruntled by this it’s because they wanted or needed to save money and you’ve thrown a wrench into that. But is it fair that they put a strain on your resources and family’s’ needs because they want a vacation they can’t fully afford?


I understand that with family these concepts are often unimaginable due to the idea that family means unconditional acceptance and family-imposed burdens are a fact of life. But I feel that even with family, once we’re all adults, we have the right to put our needs and feelings first if the opposite would cause a detrimental disruption to our lives. Of course, I’m not talking about emergencies / crises – that’s when we do whatever is needed to be there for each other. My family and friends know that’s my code. But when their needs are voluntary or elective, then I speak the truth.  Ultimately I do believe your friends and family will respect you for it, and if not, at the very least, you’ll have a less stressful week!  Think about it, and as always I love to hear your perspective.

I Challenge You!

It seems most of us like a challenge now and then. Whether it’s to push us out of our comfort zone, or to prove something to ourselves or others, people like utilizing challenges, even small ones, to shake up their status quo.  In the last couple of years I’ve seen challenges ranging from silly to stupid, and charitable to admirable. The cinnamon challenge was clearly in the stupid category, while the ice bucket challenge was silly and charitable.

December 1994, Sipadan, Borneo --- School of Neon Fusiliers --- Image by © Royalty-Free/Corbis

Current and retired educators from the Winchester, Va. area, all members of the Beta Iota chapter of the Alpha Delta Kappa fraternity, take part in the social media phenomenon, the ALS ice bucket challenge, to raise funds to combat Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS), also referred to as "Lou Gehrig's Disease," Monday, Aug. 18, 2014, in Winchester, Va. From left are Karen McCoy, Kaye Reams, Betty Saunders, Jackie Brondstater, Judy Fogle, Toni O'Connor and Melody Harmon. (AP Photo/The Winchester Star, Jeff Taylor)

My current favorite reality television show, American Ninja Warrior is a perfect example of the admirable challenge – at least from my fitness-minded perspective – watching men and women of all ages challenge their bodies and abilities to achieve feats of physical awesomeness.


So it got me thinking that perhaps I could “rally the troops” – my 3000+ followers – to accept a challenge that while it may be silly, could bestow some fitness on those of you who still dream but never DO anything to get your bodies in better shape.  Therefore, my challenge is as follows: for the next 30-days, you will do ONE 10-minute fun, silly, or challenging form of exercise per day, involving as many people as possible.

Example: challenge your spouse, kids, friends or co-workers to an in-home (or in-office) 10 minute obstacle course of hoola-hooping, jump-roping, rapid burpees, and silly-screaming jumping jacks. Or, ten minutes of free-style dancing while singing to your favorite up-beat songs (no matter how off-key or rhythmically challenged you are).

Young girls in the high jump practicing modern dance.


THEN you video-tape it and upload it to your Facebook, my facebook (, YouTube, etc. The idea here is that you get your body moving at least once a day, which will clear your head, lower your stress, give you time to connect with your loved ones, and in general boost everyone’s spirits. Make it silly, make it fun, make it challenging. Challenge those around you to outdo your challenge.

Let’s make this a movement with as much impact as the Cinnamon challenge had, but without the ridiculous and insignificant consequences! I look forward to seeing what you all come up with, and I can’t wait to try your challenges myself.



NO Shortcuts!

Working out at the gym yesterday I caught a glimpse of an infomercial selling the most ridiculous fitness-related device I’d ever seen: the “Miss Belt.” A wide velcro “compression” belt designed to squeeze your fat into place so that you’ll get “the perfect waistline in seconds” and give you an “hour-glass shape.” All for the cheap price of $19.99 + $7.99 S/H.


I literally stopped my workout and started laughing. I looked around, and several women giggled with me but a few others looked intrigued. This reminded me of the fact that so many are still looking for a shortcut, a quick remedy, an easy fix, a way to look and feel better without having to do any exercise or change your nutrition.

What is really infuriating about this product is that it messes with our society’s already confused idea of what is the “perfect” body type.  This belt contradicts the current desired body type — that of slim, skinny, and flat stomached — by offering to reposition your body into a curvy, Mae West-type hour-glass shape.  Worse yet, they show women ranging from fat to slender all enjoying the ease and comfort of this product and they even suggest that you can confidently wear it OVER your clothes (not hidden underneath) and look up to two sizes slimmer.  I’m sorry, who are we deceiving here and why? I won’t even get into the question of how does your body look and feel after hours of wearing this unflattering corset.


Women and girls are confused enough about their body image, and this throws it all into chaos in my opinion. I hate to break it to you again, but there are NO shortcuts. If you want to have a healthy percentage of body fat, and a decent level of strength and stamina then you have to make the commitment to eat all things in moderation, exercise regularly, and actively seek to eliminate gratuitous stress from your life and environment.

Until everyone is willing to take responsibility for their physical condition (or lack there of), corporations will continue to make millions of dollars off the desperate and/or lazy selling us ab toning devices, fat-burning DVDs, and body slimming belts.


Save your money – adjust your nutrition, and make a firm schedule of 30-minutes of exercise three to four times a week and you’ll get to your goal. It’s that simple and easy. Write to me when you’re ready to make that change. Until then, turn off that infomercial and walk away from the TV!

It’s More Than The Birds & The Bees.

Raising a young girl I feel a huge responsibility to educate her on what it means to be a woman, and most importantly to have confidence and good self-esteem about her body and her femininity. What I find to be the most confusing aspect of woman-hood to 90% of girls and women that I meet these days, is the misunderstanding of sex vs. love. Making things all the more convoluted is the rampant and massive porn and sex industry sending mixed messages to both genders about what it is to be a woman.


Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not getting on any prudish soapbox here. I have no issue with porn or strip clubs, as long as the women involved are first and foremost women, not girls, and secondly that they are participating with their own free will.

My issue is that girls AND boys are being fed blatantly wrong images about love, sex, bodies, nudity, and how a woman wants to be treated and should be treated. The old cliché that men want a refined, soft-spoken woman in the kitchen, and a whore in the bedroom still exists for many a young man.


Merchandise like “Bratz” dolls (see picture above) and suggestive clothing is marketed to girls as young as 8 and establishes early-on the misdirection that sexiness can only be achieved by wearing revealing clothes, stripper high-heels, and posing with your lips pursed-poutly. Furthermore, men and the media spoon feeds our little girls the misnomer that sexiness (which is actually often sluttiness) is necessary for you to be attractive enough to get a man.

I am a first generation product of the women’s sexual revolution and I appreciate the strides we have made as women to be able to have birth control that we control, that we can have sex out of wedlock without shame, and even speak up about our sexual needs and likes. BUT, I had to learn the hard way the difference between sex and love, lust and caring, as did many of my peers. I feel now it is imperative that we compound the strides made by women of the 60’s and 70’s and start speaking much more frankly with our daughters and sons.


We must explain to them the differences and nuances between love and sex. We must advise them when and how it’s okay to have sex vs. “making love.” We must teach our daughters to understand that their bodies have an affect and power over boys that neither gender can understand in the teen years, and that said power must be respected and not wielded blindly, stupidly, or just because boyfriend or peer pressure tells them that it’s okay become sexually active. We must also teach the boys that no really does mean no, even if you’re half way into the act, and that one should NEVER take advantage of a girl who is mentally impaired by drugs or alcohol.


Lastly, we have to explain to all young children and teens that women who chose to parade around with their breasts or bums revealed are not the examples we should strive for. There is a time and place for women to be dressed in lingerie (or not dressed at all), and walking around in public is not it. (Again I’m not trying to pick on strips clubs or their patrons.) Young adults need to understand that surgically enhanced breasts and stiletto heels can send the message “I’m ready to be your sex-toy” and if you choose to dress that way, then you have to expect that you’ll be treated as nothing but a sexual object. Most importantly we must emphasize that being desired sexually is okay under the right conditions, but that those conditions are very specific and when the lines are blurred so is the treatment of women and thus their self-esteem is eroded.


I know today’s blog is intense and not necessarily fitness focused, but I am passionate about all areas of life being in balance and I have so many friends and clients that are grown women and men who are still confused about sex and love, so today this is what spewed out of my brain. Think about it. Share your thoughts with me – and then get your self to the gym for a little brain-clearing exercise!


Bust The Box!

Sooner or later all of us find that one aspect or another of our lives has been dulled by routine and habit and that stagnation nags at us in the form of discontent and/or depression. If enough areas of your life are squeezed into that self-orchestrated “box” you may find that you feel stuck, bored, and frustrated yet helpless to make a change. This is when you need to not only think outside the box, but blast the walls of the box apart!


My personal forte and mode of operating for myself and as a personal trainer, life coach, and sounding board to friends and family is to always think outside the box. I say walls, rules, and “the norm” are meant to be broken if it helps you get from point A to B and beyond without hurting anyone.

So whether it’s a dead-end job, a dysfunctional relationship, or discontent with the condition/shape of your body, you CAN make a change if you’re willing to look past the four walls you’ve decided are mandatory, and become creative with your options and your abilities.


Start with the “kitchen sink” method: contemplate all options and ideas, no matter how big, small or crazy you might think they are. Write them down, stare at these ideas without casting out “yeah buts” or “there’s no way.” It’s like art, sometimes you have to simply start doodling for the creative juices to flow. Suddenly you’ll see the light, you’ll feel the inspiration where your brain actually says hey that might be possible.

Then map out a plan that takes you out of the box and onto a path of exploration and change. Focus on one step at a time so that you don’t feel overwhelmed – as change can be unsettling and overwhelming for many of us. Continue to remind yourself of how good it feels to be moving again and pat yourself on the back for being creative and making even a small change. That self-love and encouragement will go along way to silencing the fears that automatically rear up when we shake things up in our world.


Lastly, remember that there’s no time-clock here. There’s also nothing to prove to anyone but yourself. You deserve to be happier and if that means busting the box to do so, that’s not only okay, but awesome! However long it takes, slow movement is better than stagnation.

Need ideas or help finding getting out of any of life’s boxes, write to me – I can always be found somewhere outside the box.


What’s Perfect?

Remember back when we were kids and we didn’t worry about what we ate or if we’d burned enough energy to thwart off belly fat? Me too, and I’ve been trying to figure how and when we got so obsessed with the condition of our bodies and the quality of our nutrition. I believe these concerns came into play in the 80’s as America on the whole became fatter and unhealthier, and people actually started dying from nutrition related problems (heart attacks and strokes from blocked arteries, adult-onset diabetes, etc.).

Healthy eating food concept. Woman comparing unhealthy donut and orange fruit thinking isolated on a white background

Now as I go about my daily social media marketing, I see post after post dedicated to fad diets, food substitutions, quick ways to cram in exercise – all of which are surrounded by an assaulting number of flat-stomached or toned bottoms “selfies.”

The problem is that all this does is make us obsess for hours each day, about what we’re doing, or not doing to our bodies and how desperate we are to achieve a balance of nutrition and effective exercise so that we an be … what?… perfect? But perfection can never be achieved by obsessing! Webster’s Dictionary defines perfect as:

Entirely without any flaws, defects, or shortcomings; and conforming absolutely to the description or definition of an ideal type.


Well sorry to break the news to you, but NO ONE is entirely without flaws or shortcomings. Also the description or definition of an ideal type is constantly changing and more importantly, said description/definition is decided by society’s ever-changing tastes, all of which are subjective to criteria that never fits everyone (or even the majority of us).


Perfection to me (using that term very lightly) is gained when we achieve and maintain balance in our life. Balance comes from no single aspect of our lives being heavier than another. Work balanced with play. Relationships balanced by a variety of personalities and commonalities. Nutrition and physical exercise/movement balanced with smaller indulgences in foods we love that may be less healthy, and cerebral pursuits that refill our creative wells.

Lastly, balance depends upon a quality of time spent on our own, and learning to accept our flaws and shortcomings, and appreciating (and acknowledging) our own strengths. No one will ever have a balanced life if they are obsessing over anything.


I long to see a reduction in posts showing tight torsos and paleo recipes. I yearn to see posts where people are living happy balanced lives. I’m not sure how to move society towards these goals, except to plant seeds with my friends, fans and followers that can perhaps grow into a societal shift. So if you agree with the sentiments herein, share this blog to all your friends, fans and followers and perhaps we can all stop obsessing and start living in better balance.